I now present to you the coffee pot, or rather the moka pot. I wish I had a little more time to illustrate its functions and the many ways to use it, but I will limit myself to listing the essentials so as not to become boring. It is truly a versatile object. In addition to its original purpose, we use it to iron trousers, to drive nails into walls, when we buy walnuts we use it as a nutcracker, when we make the precious pesto sauce, we use it to crush pine nuts, and we also use it to make mash with peeled Cirio brand tomatoes or potatoes and many other things. But the moment that sends me into ecstasy, is when I hear its final gurgle in sending up the coffee and its aroma, which penetrates my nostrils. It is a great enjoyment.
Here is the gas cooker. A real marvel to the inmate, lest one forget the moka pot. I present it to you in its perfect form. Simply assemble it and it is ready for use. Here, I wanted to show you all its components so that you can better appreciate this wonderful object.
I cannot restrain myself. Something must be said about this instrument; not to sing its praises, but rather to speak with love, esteem and affection for the object it has come to replace. Now, I’ll tell you: once upon a time, not so long ago, when it was still possible to buy Cirio peeled tomatoes in this creepy place—you’ll think I’ll start with a boring parade of praise about the 1001 sauces that can be made with the precious tomato pulp, but that’s not the case—the most precious commodity for us inmates was the sheet metal that served as a lid, a truly multipurpose tool, a real salvation for us. We could use it to cut meat, peel potatoes, chop onions, slice a piece of salami or bacon, peel a carrot and a thousand other things; all things that no plastic knife can do so well and so easily, not to mention that to peel a potato you need at least three plastic knives because they break so easily. This little sheet should be praised by all inmates and will be missed because it is now gone and I, perhaps more than any other inmate, can vouch for its effectiveness as I have used it for six decades and don’t know how much longer. I can assure you that it has never failed me. When I get out of here, I want to go on a pilgrimage to its production house and pray to Saint Cirio to thank the souls of those responsible and bring the sheets back into the prison circuit. I will also pray to him for serving me with true love for so long. Of course, I will not pray to San Cragnotti, the former owner of Cirio. We both served Cirio and each in his own way exploited it, but what can I say? I’m sorry about the plastic knives, but compared to Cirio’s sheet metal, they’re a real nothing.
This is a system that prevents the flame of the cooker from directly hitting the pan, essentially creating a kind of oven. The plate that is placed between the cooker and the pan is made of steel and is supplied to inmates when they enter the institution.
Clear out the wall cupboard, wash it, disinfect it thoroughly, pierce the shelf dividing it into two levels with a nail heated on the cooker, drill two holes of the diameter necessary to conveniently screw and unscrew the cooker, take four empty beer cans and arrange them so that you can place the baking tray in them. If you want a more effective oven, collect silver paper from cigarette packs to line the inside of the cupboard.
Another way to make an oven is as follows: wrap a wooden stool with newspaper, and place a cooker in a corner with a steel plate on top to act as a sideboard so that the flame does not come into direct contact with the bottom of the baking tray.
To create a useful object for slicing, you need to rub a piece of wood (preferably plywood) or Formica against a rough surface (such as a wall or floor), applying pressure first on one side and then on the other to thin out the shape. Repeat the process several times on both sides.
The things needed are: a toothbrush previously stripped of its bristled head and a blade of a pencil sharpener. The handle of the toothbrush is heated at one end over the flame of a gas cooker and the blade of the pencil sharpener is inserted into its soft part, allowing it to cool.
Remove the serrated part of 5 plastic knives, get a strip of double plywood and make small slits to insert the knife serrations. You will obtain a perfect grater that can be used for cheese, vegetables and more.
Rub an empty gas cylinder on a rough surface (wall or floor) to wear out the joint connecting the bottom of the cylinder to the rest. Once separated, the bottom will have to be drilled with the nail made from the plunger of an old cooker using the coffee pot as a hammer.
Find a broomstick to break into smaller pieces. To cut it evenly, rub the section you will break around the entire perimeter of the stick using one edge of the radiator. Then press the stick between two elements of the radiator and give it a sharp blow. Rub the piece you will use as a rolling pin on the rough floor to remove stains, boil a pot of water, and soak the stick to disinfect it.
Italian prisons have freezers that prisoners can use but they are not accessible 24 hours a day. To keep food and drinks cold in your cell during other times, it is necessary to make your own refrigerator. Find 6 polystyrene containers used for packaging mozzarella. Collect a significant amount of silver paper. Carefully cut out the bottom of 5 of these containers, using one as a base. Glue one of the other four vertically on each side, with the other bottom as the lid, and cover both inside and outside with foil.
